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MY WEIGHTS ARE GONE, I AM SET FREE!

Saturday, December 31, 2011

Hope for Tomorrow

So today is New Years Eve, and I am determined to be hopeful for the upcoming New Year. This past year has been very challenging, and I feel as though I have stepped back a few steps instead of moving forward. I am hoping that the New Year will bring with it some new hope and renewal of strength. I feel drained and tired. I know that there are seasons in life. I know that this current season in my life is a time of work, blood, sweat and tears.... but, tomorrow... yes tomorrow comes rest, prosperity and peace. There is always tomorrow. Always hope for joy to come in the morning. Though the night may tarry for what seems like eternity, morning always rises with the sun.

"Hope is the thing with feathers, that perches in the soul, and sings the tune without words, and never stops at all."
Emily Dickinson


With this quote I end.

Friday, December 30, 2011

Lesson's From A Japanese Proverb

Life can be complicated sometimes. Lately my life has been just that... complicated. Just when I think I am getting ahead, something happens that throws me back a million miles. I fall down hard sometimes. Then, I have get back up and start over. There is a Japanese Proverb that says this: "Fall seven times and stand up eight." I love this proverb. I makes me feel better about all the times I have fallen. I have to find the resilience to stand back up after each fall. Stand up tall!

Sometimes it is not always me that falls. It can be a family member that falls. When someone I love and care about falls down I feel as though I have fallen too. It hurts just as much too.

Today, is one of these days. A loved one has done something that they should not have done. Nothing horrible, or life threatening, just something they should not have done. It makes me sad and want to cry... but, it also makes me want to try harder. To be better. To teach more wisely. Although I cannot control the choices that my loved ones make, (only my own choices). I can however, educate them when they do make the wrong choice to make a better choice the next time. I can show them how to get back up, dust yourself off and try again. Supporting someone when they are at their worst can be difficult and painful, but that is the time when someone needs your support the most.

So, today I stand tall as I help pull someone else up after they have fallen. I will do this as many times as needed, until they can stand up tall on their own. This only makes my journey in life better.

Monday, December 26, 2011

Catching My Breath

So.... I have asthma. I was astounded when I was diagnosed with it 2 years ago. I was always very active. I ran eight miles a day when I was in school. After I had my kids I would bike for miles with them in tow. Then out of nowhere a couple of years ago I started losing my breath doing the simplest of things. I was even waking up in the middle of the night not able to breath or catch my breath. At first I thought it was panic attacks. Or rather, everyone I know that I explained my symptoms to told me it was panic attacks. Isn't it amazing how people you know become doctors and immediately diagnose you when you are having any kind of weird symptom. One friend of mine even convinced me that I was dying of lung cancer. So... I decided to call the real doctor and get this thing checked out. As I sat in the doctors office after explaining all of my symptoms and getting an x-ray, I was anxiously awaiting her diagnosis. She decided that there was incredible density in my lungs and referred me to a pulmonary specialist. I had to wait 2 weeks before I would see him though. During that time... I was convinced I was dying of stage 4 lung cancer. It was the most horrific time of my life. Just not knowing what was wrong with me, and expecting the worst case scenario to be wrong with me put me into a state of mind that I hope I never have to revisit any time soon. My incredible husband and adoring children reminded me every day that I was going to be okay. That there was no way God was going to take me from them. They were my Jonathan's as I was experiencing a David moment in life. After the two week of waiting was over, many tears were shed, and many sleepless nights passed I got my answer. No it was not stage 4 lung cancer... it was simply asthma. Adult onset asthma to be exact. All of the density in my lungs was merely scar tissue from having pneumonia so much as a child.

PHEW! I can't tell you the relief I felt. The doctor prescribed singular and a emergency inhaler. Two years later I am still on these medications and breathing much better. However, it is amazing what a thought of having an incurable disease such as stage 4 lung cancer can do to a person. This moment in my life changed the direction of which I was going. It caused me to rethink my life. Rethink my future. Rethink what really mattered.

As I reflect over this past year in preparation for entering into a New Year days from now, I can't help but remember how blessed I am. Yes, there are experiences this year I wished I hadn't had to experienced. There were moments I had hoped I had not had to live. But, mostly there was experiences and moments I am so thankful for. I want to enter this New Year being ever so thankful for the many blessings as well as the many trials I have faced. It is the bumps in the road that make us more resilient and stronger to face each new day.


"Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward."
Author Unknown

Sunday, December 25, 2011

Christmas Morning

This Christmas was a bit different then any other Christmas. I spent Christmas Eve at the Hospital with my mom. She felt like she was dying, so we called the ambulance. Thankfully it was just heart burn. But none the less I spent a few hours in the ER with my mom. This made me see things in a different perspective in my life. It is amazing what a trip to the ER can do to a person.

Just when you think you have all your ducks in a row, and life could not get any better. Seriously, what is better then Christmas with your whole family surrounding you? Then BOOM! You are in the ER, thinking the worst. Hoping for the best. Praying for a miracle. As my mom was breathing breath and being diagnosed with a non lifethreatening illness, someone in that same ER was taking their last breath. Family members gathered, saying their last goodbye. Life becomes clearer to the living. More vivid, more hopeful. But, for those who lose someone... on Christmas Eve, there life becomes a little dimmer.

So, as you gather around your Christmas trees, or Christmas dinner tables today remember this quote by Charles Dickens.

"I have always thought of Christmas time, when it has come round, as a good time; a kind, forgiving, charitable time; the only time I know of, in the long calendar of the year, when men and women seem by one consent to open their shut-up hearts freely, and to think of people below them as if they really were fellow passengers to the grave, and not another race of creatures bound on other journeys."


Look around you. People everywhere. Happy and hurting, Joyful and tearful, Rejoicing and greiving... they are everywhere... Spread to all the Christmas cheer:

"For unto us was born this day a savior JESUS CHRIST THE LORD."
Luke 2:11

Thursday, July 21, 2011

I Am A Writer

Yes... I have taken a few days off of writing again. It is Summer and in the Summer you take vacation. I was on vacation for a few days. Now I am back again.

So while I was on vacation, I got to thinking... Thinking that, life is really short and it is so important to follow your dreams before time runs out to achieve them. My dream, since I can remember, is to become a published author someday. There I said it. Well actually I wrote it. I wrote it out loud for all to read. But, mostly I wrote it out loud for myself to remember. I had forgotten. Forgotten what my passion is. Put it on the back burner of life, and stepped away. Today, I am not going to do that. I am going to instead... run towards my passion to be a published author, embrace it and cease the moment. I am not sure how, or what, or where but I have decided when. TODAY is when. Today Is NOW! I have to fulfill this life long dream. I HAVE TO!

I believe that God puts our dreams and passions in our lives and in our hearts for a reason. I believe that when He knits us together in the wombs He knits those dreams and passions into our very essence for us to become who He predestined us to be. When He knit me together in my Mother's womb He knit me with a pen and journal in my hand. Since I learned how to write, I have been writing. Writing my heart and soul, spilling my guts, recording my dreams and pouring out what He has poured into me with pen onto paper. I am a writer!

I was so fearful to tell others my dream to be a writer. Afraid that if I told people about my dream to be a published author, it would never come true. But, today I am pushing through the fear and confessing to all who reads these words today.... I have a dream... a dream to write, to be heard, to be published and a dream to achieve my goal in becoming a published author. There I said it!!!! I am a writer.

"Therefore write the things which you have seen, and the things which are, and the things which will take place after these things."
Revelation 1:19

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Family Is Where It Is At

Today I am sitting here just basking in the joy that I have all of my family together right now. You see I have two teenage boys that love to be with their friends all of the time. My one son who is 17 and officially a Senior this year... is absolutely never home. Between working and being out with friends I barely see him any more... and frankly I do not like it. My other son is 13 and just starting to be out all of the time with friends. That is what happens with teenagers, they get to this place of being independent and no longer need you or want you any more. It breaks my heart to let go but I have to. I have to release them and trust God that I have raised them well in Him. Trust God that they will be okay as I do release them into this world.

My oldest just got his drivers license recently and is working really hard and saving money to buy his very first car. I am so proud of him and his work ethic. So very proud that he gets up every day, goes to school, comes home for a few minutes and heads strait to work every night. He did this and maintained a very good grade point average all year. This makes me thankful today.

My other son is just starting to spread his wings to fly. He is a bit more academic then my older son and is really into sports. So instead of going to school and then to work, he goes to school and then stays after for sports or some academic after school event. So I barely see him either. However, I am still thankful that I have a son that is so dedicated to his school work and his school sports. For this I am thankful today.

Even though it is summer and school is out, I am off work and I have more time with my kids... or so you would think. I am still working 2 days a week at a Family Center teaching Parenting Classes, my kids are off with friends most days and life is still being lived and breathed mostly separate from my boys. So, whatever time I do have with them together is time that I cherish.

While they sleep at night you can often find me sneaking into their rooms to kiss them on their foreheads and utter a prayer or two over them. When they are up and moving I am cooking and cleaning up after them with a thankful heart for every moment (even if it is a messy job moment), that I have to be with them and to be their mommy. Today I am thankful for my family... because to me my family is where it is at.

"Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them." Psalm 127:5

Monday, July 11, 2011

Multitudes on Monday



312. Waking up to the smell of fresh brewed coffee.
313. A full blue sky with a bright yellow sun.
314. The sound of water hitting the rocks.
315. The sound of your husband voice as he whispers sweet nothings in your ear.
316. A son triumph to become a licensed driver.
317. Having just enough.
318. Being needed.
319. Dogs rolling in the dirt after a bath! UGH!
320. Fresh picked tomatoes from a garden.
321. Sweet corn.
322. Cucumber salads.
323. Squishing sand between your toes.
324. The smell of pine.
325. Summer's fire pit.

So thankful for today and the many blessings in my life. Look close there are blessing around every corner!

Sunday, July 10, 2011

Sunday Sunshine

I am so happy to be writing again. To be starting my journey to shed weights in my life again. I am trying to get back to the basics of life, of faith and of myself. Sometimes we can get so caught up in the process of life we forget to live life. We forget how far we have come and sometimes take steps backwards instead of forward. I was doing this. That is why I am starting over. I am going back to the simple steps, the abc's of life. The "Jesus Loves Me This I Know" phase. That's right... the way back to Sunday School mode! I am determined to take all the baby steps that I need to get myself back to the place I need to be in Him. Sometimes when we run too fast we miss a step along the way and it forces us to back track to find out where we went wrong. What step did I miss?

I lost sight of myself and more importantly of I lost sight of God somewhere on my journey. No, I did not backslide or go to a place of horrible sin and corruption. I did however, lose something. I lost joy.... I lost the music and the dance and I just started to run. I was running so fast... way to fast to enjoy the journey. Time was moving by at expeditious speed that I could only hear the hum from the speed I was going and I no longer heard His voice. I had to stop. I had to stop running the race I was in and just step back from it all. I stopped writing, I stopped running, I stopped everything. I became still. I wanted to be still and know Him, the great I AM. I wanted to stop and listen for His voice again, for His song again. I wanted to hear... oh how I wanted to hear Him.

I know it tells us in scripture to "run the race set before us..." there is a time and a season to run... run with fervor. But, my time to run was over... it is now my time to just be still and know He is. He is the Sunshine on this Sunday afternoon. He is the silence in the stillness of night and He is here with me ready to sing a new song. I just had to stop running the race and just bask in the presence of Him to learn this. It is my time to learn... running is over for now. I must just sit and learn so that I can run an even bigger race when the time comes. So for now, I bask in Sunday's Sunshine and listen to the great I AM... listen and be still and LEARN.

Friday, July 8, 2011

Faithful Friday

Sitting here just thinking.... Thinking about how amazingly faithful God is to me. How no matter what my circumstance or predicament, God is there faithfully standing by my side. He catches me when I fall, comforts me when I am wounded, encourages me to go on when I feel like I can't move and He remains faithful to me when I lose all of my faith in this life.

I have had many faithless moments. Many uncertain minutes. Too many to count days where I have doubted the saving grace of my Savior. Why do I have moments of weakness? Why do I have doubts and faithlessness? I have been saved almost all of my life and I still wonder... wonder if I will make it? Will I make it to see Him face to face? Will my life count for something when I breathe my last breath? Will when I take that final breath move forward to the sound of His voice speaking these words to me; "Well done my faithful servant enter into my Kingdom today."

My hope and prayer and my entire existence really comes down to this... Am I faithful? Am I able to withstand the doubts and fears that arise? Am I able to move forward even in the fiercest moments of combat? Do I remain faithful even in my weakest moments in this life? These are the questions I ask myself today. For I have seen my share of battles. I have carried with me many battle scars in life.... but through it all I have felt the imprint of God in my lifetime. I am His. I am faithfully, fearlessly HIS. I will hold on firmly, with a tight grip to this.

"We must continue to hold firmly to our declaration of faith. The one who made the promise is faithful." Hebrews 10:23

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Back On Track


So.... I know it has been a while since I last wrote. A lot has been happening in my life that I just had to live out without writing for a while. I had to take it all in. Every inch of it... every moment of it. But, today here I am! Writing to relive the experience I gained through some of the moments I have lived in life. I am officially on Summer break. I have been spending most of my days enjoying the view at my Summer home on the Lake. I hope you enjoy the view also, with the picture I included.

I have decided to reread the book Thin Within as I laze around. I am realizing that we should never get to comfortable thinking we have conquered all of our weaknesses. You see I thought I had this eating thing under full control... but I was sadly mistaken. I discovered by rereading Thin Within that I have a long way to go. To be quite honest, I don't think I will ever fully get there. I still have "stinkin thinkin" in my head and heart about life, God and food. Yes, I faced many big issues in my life last Summer when I first discovered Thin Within. Yes, I no longer over eat and am overweight. Yes, many chains have fallen off of my life and I have been set free from heavy weights that pulled me down for many years. But.... there is more losing and releasing that must take place in my life. Sure, the obvious things have been dealt with. However, now the deeper digging starts. The peeling back of another layer in my life begins. Am I ready for this? God must think so, so I must believe that I can face another painful digging. I can, if He says I can.

So I am allowing God to shovel away at my heart of hearts again. To go deeper still. This time the digging is more complex, as if there is some cherished treasure that needs special care. The digging is slower and more deliberate. Like an excavation of uncovering some great worth. Could it be that I am of great worth.... that something lost deep down inside of me could be of great value and beauty?

I am anxious to see what God digs up from inside of me. Sure, it may be painful. But beauty is pain. I will go there... to that painful place of excavation and digging to see the beauty arise. I am ready, I ma back on track and ready!

“...Peace to you, do not be afraid. Your God and the God of your father has put treasure in your sacks for you..." Genesis 43:23

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Is Anyone Out There?

I have been writing again but not getting any reply.... is anyone out there???
I would love to hear from you.... Let me know what you are thankful for today.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Being Thankful Always

So today is a new day. I realized something this morning... I only have 6 days left of work for the year and I am off for the Summer. I am relieved and sad at the same time. Relieved to be done and sad that I will not have a steady paycheck for two months. God always provides me with enough though to get me through the 2 months of no steady income.
I want to say focused today on being thankful for the things I have not dwelling hopelessly on the things I do not have.
I am thankful for a wonderful husband who is strong and courageous. I am thankful for two healthy boys to raise. I am thankful for my three homes. I am thankful for a mom who is still alive and well and such a blessing in my life. I am thankful for my two brothers and two sisters whom I love and cherish. I am thankful to have had a father that loved me unconditionally when he was alive. I am thankful for this blog and the wonderful people I have met through having it. All of those who follow me and whom I follow, thank you so much for inspiring me every day with your words. I am thankful today for words, the beautiful words that God inspires us to write and allows me to have eyes to read.

Blessings to you all my friends...

Monday, June 13, 2011

Multitudes On Monday

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It has been a while but I will continue on with my list:

301: Promises
302: Hope
303: Faith
304: Purity
305: Sincerity
306: Love
307: Compassion
308: Passion
309: Fire
310: Zeal

I pray every day I have all of these qualities listed on my list, in my life. That all of these small simple words that have great meaning play some kind of a role in all of my choices every day. That I may choose to live out the meanings of each word written on my list today.

"And give thanks for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ." Ephesians 5:20

Friday, June 10, 2011

What Is Your Passion?

I am amazed at all of the blogger's out there that find time every day to write... I was on a roll writing every day for quite some time them boom! All of a sudden it all stopped. Now I am back and I find it hard to find the time to write but I feel so much better when I do write.

I was born to write... Like a fish to water so is writing for me. I feel the most alive and full when I am writing. My goal since I was a little girl was to become a published author. I always felt that I would never achieve that goal, but now I feel so much better about my writing skills, because it is not about what I write really, it is about just writing in general. Knowing your passion and just doing it. Becoming who you are meant to be by following your passion is the key. I was meant to write. I am a writer. I know I have not been writing on my blog, but I have been writing in my journal every day sometimes twice a day.

So write me back, tell me what you have been doing lately in your life. I would love to hear from you. What is your passion?

Thursday, June 9, 2011

Life Get's In The Way

Sometimes life can just be moving way to fast and get in the way of peace and serenity . Lately, life has been doing that to me. With all of the end of the year preparations at my job and all of the added responsibilities of opening up my Lake house for the year, two fighting dogs, a broken computer and two teenage boys preparing for finals and regents... phew life has been a little invasive to the peace I so crave.
I look out over the day and wonder will there be just one fleeting moment of stillness and catching of my breath? Then I remember... at least I still have breath within me to catch.
A few days ago a couple that comes to the facility where I teach Infant Care Classes, lost their son. He was only six years old. He was hit by a truck... twice. When I saw the report on the news and recognized the couple from classes where I teach, my heart broke. Broke into pieces. I fell down sobbing in my living room wondering how awful it must be to this young couple to lose their six year old baby boy. How senseless it all was. But life is like that... it gets in the way. It blindsides us sometimes and makes us gasp for air as we are sucker punched with tragedies, sorrows and things that just don't make sense. Yet, He is there. There for us to lean into when the many awful, ugly and painful things happen in our lives and the lives of those around us.
As I sit here and write this today I write through the thickness, through the fire and smoke... and find some clean air to breathe. Words are my breathe of fresh air. His living word revives my soul bringing illuminating light to darkness. I am thankful today for God's word when life gets in the way!

"Thy word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path."
Psalm 119:105

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

It's Been Too Long...

I know I have been away for quite some time. I am sorry. I have been busy, plus my laptop is still broken. I never have time to get on my son's laptop... he is always on it. But today, he is out with friends so I am able to write, and it feels so good. I have all of these words bottled up inside of me. My life is crazy right now. Those of you who have been following me for a while know that last Summer my two beautiful dogs Chance and Jammer started fighting. Then as quick as they started fighting they stopped, and for nine glorious months not one tiff ensued between them until this Sunday, and boy was it quite the quarrel. They even drew blood. It was scary to say the least. Since Sunday I have been keeping them separate until I decide what to do next. I have talked to my vet and several others who are knowledgeable of these kinds of things and I have to tell you all of the options cost money.... So bottom line... please pray for me. Pray for my dogs that God will give me wisdom to know what to do.

For now I will just remember the things I am thankful for:

Hot Spring Days.
Lemons.
The fresh smell of clean laundry.
Computer time.
Friends to talk to.
Dogs to love (even when they fight).
A husband who celebrates his birthday tomorrow.
Two teenage sons to love.
A school year almost being over.
LOVE, LOVE, LOVE!!!

God's blessings to you all.


Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Laptop broken

Having problems with my laptop.... as soon as it is fixed I will be back. Borrowed my son's laptop to write this.... If anyone is out there and cares, I will be back as soon as I can.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Walk With Him Wednesday



291. Finding hope through suffering.

292. Leaves appearing on trees overnight.

293. Finding a friend in a stranger.

294. Finding confidence after defeat.

295. The song of the rain.

296. Feeding a growling stomach.

297. Crisp, green colorful salad.

298. Being thankful for the cross.

299. An empty tomb.

300. Love overflowing.

"Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that you will abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."
Romans 15:13


In His Great Love,

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Thankful Tuesday

Today I am getting some furniture delivered. I have been up since the crack of dawn, moving beds and mattresses to make room for new beds and mattresses. The joy of being a housewife with the week off from work. I think I work harder when I have days off then I do when I am at work. Go figure? It is part of the job of being a woman, mother and wife.

I wanted to write about how thankful I am for being able to be home and around for my kids when they are young and need me. Even now that they are teenagers in High School they still need me. So today this Thankful Tuesday, I am thankful for time with my kids... even if it is a lot of work!!! :)

Enjoy your day today,

Monday, April 18, 2011

Multitudes on Monday



281. A week off of vacation.

282. Both kids home asleep in their beds.

283. No rushing around frantic.

284. The still of the night.

285. The still of the morning.

286. The sound of my laptops keyboard strumming out words.

287. The sun shining in my bedroom window.

288. Clean sheets.

289. A new mattress.

290. Kisses on my forehead.


"Now may the Lord of peace Himself continually grant you peace in every circumstance. The Lord be with you all!"
2 Thessalonians 3:16

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Palm Sunday



Today is Palm Sunday... so I will reflect all day thinking about what that means.

I want to share my thoughts with you today in a poem I wrote several years ago. It is a poem I take out this time of year to help me put this Season's meaning into perspective. I hope you enjoy it.

He Died For Me
By: Angelina Brignola

I have often heard the saying that if I was the only person on earth.
Jesus still would have died for only me.
I know that this is true.
That Jesus died on the cross for me.

Deeper than that, if indeed I was the only one on earth
And Jesus had to die on the cross for me…
I would have been the one to put Him on the cross to die.

It would have been me to despise and reject Him.
It would have been me to laugh at Him and mock Him.
It would have been me to curse Him and scorn Him.
It would have been me to beat Him and whip Him.
It would have been me to bruise Him and pierce Him.
It would have been me to put a crown
of thorns upon His head.
It would have been me to nail His hands
and His feet upon the cross.
It would have been me.

It was me.
I put Jesus on the cross to die.
He spilt every drop of blood in His body
to cover of my sins.
Every wound He suffered was for my transgressions.
Every stripe upon His back was for me,
that I might be healed from every sickness and disease.
Every ounce of sorrow and grief that He endured,
He endured for me.
That I might be set free from everything
that holds me captive.

Jesus died a cruel death.
My sins killed an innocent man.
I am the guilty one.
Yet, He loved me so much…
That even while I was His enemy;
HE DIED FOR ME.


"He was wounded for our rebellious acts. He was crushed for our sins. He was punished so that we could have peace, and we received healing from his wounds."
Isaiah 53:5

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Will I Allow Myself To Be Silenced?

Since I was shut down last week on blogger, I have been a little hesitant to pour out my heart on Blogger since. I was so upset that I was locked out of my own blog, and that my own heartfelt words were silenced. I felt as though something very unjust had happened to me, and that something very invasive assaulted my life. It made me rethink, if I would even continue to write on my blog. But, here I am writing. Here I am pouring out my heart on this Saturday morning. Here I am allowing words to come forth from deep within my being, for others to read. Here I am!

I wrestled with the thought of not continuing on my blogger journey and a I realized something...
Why should I allow something unjust to silence something just? Writing about God and what He is doing in my life is the most just thing I can do. So, why should I let something that should not have happened take my voice and my words away from me?

To write is my right. It is my voice being heard. My heart being listened to. My thoughts being pondered. My experience being considered. My inner depth coming forth for all those listening to hear and feel. Writing is the living stream of water deep down in my soul that waters the tree of life in my life and even in the life of others. So today, I write. I write to be heard, after days of being silenced. I have decided I will NOT allow myself to be silenced ever again. I will stand and be counted, speak and be listened to, walk and not grow weary in this blogging world of words. If not for anyone else, but for myself. For the living stream of water to flow freely from within myself, to water the tree of life in my own heart.

So here I am, writing... writing for all to see and hear that GOD IS GOOD. He is so good!!!!

"Nothing can alter the character of God. In the course of a human life, tastes and outlook and temper may change radically: a kind, equable man may turn bitter and crotchety: a man of good-will may grow cynical and callous. But nothing of this sort happens to the Creator. He never becomes less truthful, or merciful, or just, or good, than He used to be."
J.I. Packer

Thursday, April 14, 2011

I Surrender All

Today I am so thankful that I am able to wake up, breathe in an out, and have another day here on earth to live in. In this world of uncertainty, we have numbered days... not knowing when our last day may be. I watched a couple of days ago as a bird landed in my driveway and breathed it's last breath. It bowed his head, breathing in and out two more times, then just expired. I thought about that bird all day, every day since he died in my driveway, right before my eyes. I thought about how every breath we breath are numbered. When I reach my final breath will I just bow my head and expire, as the bird did? Or will I fight kicking and screaming? Most days I am fighting to survive. Fighting to work, fighting to get ahead, fighting to pay another bill... then once in a while I am able to breath easy, head bowed and just go with it. But those moments are far and few in between. I would like to think that after 32 years of being a Christian, I would have all of this figured out, but the truth is I am only footsteps away from where I started. This Christian journey has really just begun for me. I am finally on my way to a deeper understanding, that I can bow my head and give up my last breath to Him and allow Him to breath and move and has His way through me. Surrender. Total surrender. The bowing of head and lifting of hands to Him, the one who sits on the throne. I surrender Lord! I surrender ALL!

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Walk With Him Wednesday



Today I am thankful for all of these things...


271. Words.

272. Listening.

273. Hearing.

274. Learning.

275. Books.

276. Reading.

277. Writing.

278. Talking.

279. Seeing.

280. Ears.


What are you thankful for today?

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

The Gift of Writing

In my long list of duties, I find it most relaxing as I sit in front of my laptop and write, or when I pull out my journals and write. Writing has been a big part of my life since I learned to write. Writing is what always, always, ALWAYS... draws me to God. It is a gift, a pretty little, perfectly wrapped gift... when you unwrap words and put them into a neat little sentence. Writing has a way to gather up all of the loose ends in my life and put them into perspective, make them neat and give them understanding and purpose. So today I write to put things back where they belong. I write to unwrap all of the gifts that God wants to give me, with every word he puts on my heart to write. Today I recognize this beautiful gift of writing and I unwrap this gift and admire it. Thank you so much God for the gift of writing.

Monday, April 11, 2011

Multitudes On Monday




Today I am so thankful. So very, very thankful that:

256. Spring has finally sprung.

257. The warmth of the sun.

258. The fragrance of flowers.

259. Things back in their proper place.

260. Serenity of nature.

261. Birds singing new songs.

262. Triumph and victories.

263. Warm breezes.

264. Dogs lapping up water after running and playing in the yard.

265. Smiles and kisses.

266. Hugs

267. Swedish fish (the red ones).

268. knowing eyes.

269. Fulfillment in the little things.

270. Songs that make you want to dance.

"...We give thanks to you, O God, we give thanks, for your Name is near; men tell of your wonderful deeds."
Psalm 75:1


Friday, April 8, 2011

I Was Shut Down

For 3 days my blog was shut down, I am not sure why but I sure was upset over it. I was so excited about the post that went up on Wednesday on Incourage, and then bloop, out of no where my blog disappeared. I am so relieved to find it back up and running again.
So... starting tomorrow I will begin journal on my blog once again... for now I wanted to just say, I am so glad to be back up and running.


Sincerely,
Angelina

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

A Blessed Day

Today I am so blessed and honored that a piece I originally wrote on 3/3/11 will be re posted here at this website:




Just click on this button and you will go directly to my post here at incourage.

God makes our dreams come true. My namesake Angelina Ann means "angelic messenger filled with grace". To write is the way in which I can share God's message of grace to the world. When God knit me together in my mother's womb He knit me with words to write for all to read. I am so blessed today to share some of the words in my heart that He inspired me to write for many eyes to see today. I hope you click the button up above and read... Blessings everyone!!!

Monday, April 4, 2011

More to Add To The List



241. Tying up loose ends.

242. A-ha moments.

243. Discovering that you can when everyone else said that you couldn't.

244. Blue, clear skies.

245. Pictures in the clouds.

246. Lady bugs landing on noses.

247. A warm, cozy bed to sleep in.

248. A pillow to rest your head upon.

249. Something lost has been found.

250. Puddles to splash in.

251. Lakes to swim in.

252. Shade under a tree.

253. Trees that clap their hands.

254. Leaves fluttering in the wind.

255. Feeding the hungry.


"Let your roots grow down into him, and let your lives be built on him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness."
Colossians 2:7

Sunday, April 3, 2011

I Write


I write today, this moment for the here and now. I also write so that I can look back and savor the moment. Each time that I compose my heart into words on paper, I am enabling myself to capture that memory, that thought, that feeling for all of eternity. To write is to establish a permanent mark, an everlasting record that can be stored away for future reference. You can read back what you wrote years from now and feel as though you are reliving the moment, and the feeling of the moment all over again. You can look back and see the transformation of your life taking shape. You can read the words along the journey of the metamorphose that is taking place within your life and remember each step that it took to get you to where you are today. As you read each word of what you felt and how your life has completely evolved you can feel a deeper sense of hope for the future that awaits you. As you discover with each paragraph you read what it took to get you where you are today, you are able to relive the emotion, reclaim the victories and revisit the memory of what you write. So today I write... so that tomorrow I can remember what God has done and will continue to do in my life. There is victory in writing.

"But words are things, and a small drop of ink, falling like dew upon a thought, produces that which makes thousands, perhaps millions, think."
Lord Byron


"Write from the soul, not from some notion what you think the marketplace wants. The market is fickle; the soul is eternal."
Jeffrey A. Carver

Saturday, April 2, 2011

His Masterpiece

I have been discovering who I am... what I am made of and how I am well equipped to face life, every moment of life no matter what. That the past mistakes, heart aches and pains are gone. Life is constantly moving and evolving into something more beautiful then I could have ever hoped or dreamed.

Life is filled with ups and downs, lights and shadows. Life has a wave, a current and a balance. You are either up or down, in or out. I have had my share of all. I am discovering however, that no matter what view I see... He is there, gently leading and whole heartily navigating me through it all. It doesn't matter if I come undone in the process of the journey He has me on because, He is there picking up the pieces that fall away and adding new ones when needed.

He is there adding color to the gray areas. Painting with His hand steady, colorful brushstrokes of pure genius. The picture He is creating of my life is more vibrant then anything I could have imagined to create on my own. As I stand back to look upon the picture He is making, my breath is stolen from me, for He takes my breathe away. How could this ordinary girl become so extraordinary? Yet, His eyes see me completely different then I see myself. I see the ugly truth. He sees the beautiful, colorful work of art He has created me to be. I see in part, He sees in full.

He has been adjusting my eyes to see as He sees. Beholding His majesty and splendor as it transcends my life portrait. His beauty in my life fills the canvas of my heart and shines with every brush stroke of His hand upon my life. My portrait that He creates is the kind that will never fade, will get better and more valuable with time and age and will leave you longing to see more of His art work. It is filled with colors that I have never seen or known of before. I am His creation. His handiwork. What He creates is more beautiful then words can describe. I am His work of art on display for the whole world to see. How incredibly amazing He is... the artist of all creation is creating a masterpiece in me.

"For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago."
Ephesians 2:10

Friday, April 1, 2011

Still No Words


Today I still have no words... well maybe one:




Thanks to God for always being there for me... and for this promise He says to me every day of my life:









Thursday, March 31, 2011

No Words

I started this day with nothing to write. I was at a loss for words. I could only sit down at His feet and listen today. Listen to Him breathe. Listen to the heart beat of the chest that I laid my head upon. There were no words spoken, just breath and heart beats. I realized something while I laid my head there. His breath was my breath. The beat of His heart beat was in perfect sync with mine. We were one.

I didn't need to hear a word uttered from His mouth. Just feeling the unity, the oneness with my Savior was all that I needed for today. So this Thursday, this day, this moment... there are no words (well maybe just a few), there is only the breath that I breathe with Him. There is only the rhythem of beats that my heart beats with His. I lay still and listen to Him as I lie my head upon His chest. It is here I find strength and meaning to my life.

"The Spirit of God has made me, and the breath of the Almighty gives me life."
Job 33:4

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Walk With Him Wednesday



231. Thought provoking questions.

232. Penetrating answers.

233. Taking risks.

234. Living the dream.

235. Going out on a limb.

236. Climbing mountains.

237. Soaring high above the storm.

238. The last piece of the puzzle fitted in it's place.

239. Forgetting reasons to grumble.

240. Remembering to be grateful and thankful in all things.

"Let the message about Christ, in all its richness, fill your lives. Teach and counsel each other with all the wisdom he gives. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts."
Colossians 3:16

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

A Reason To Be Thankfyul

Today was one of those days that you are just glad is over. Since I began my journey to list all of the gifts in my life... the 1,000 gifts, I decided to never grumble. Today I grumbled. I grumbled a bit last night too. I messed up, and I grumbled.

I had to reflect back today and read my list of gifts over... even add a few new ones to the list. I had to step back away from the noise of my life and just thank God for the moment, even this hectic, crazy moment in my life that I am in right now. I am thankful today. Thankful that even when the world screams around me frantically, He stills my heart and quiets my soul.

There is always a reason to be thankful... Always a reason to Thank God. ALWAYS!

Today I am thankful for the safe haven I get to call home, for my comfy chair that I sit in as I write this right now, for my beautiful children that await me every day and for this very moment in time that gives me a reason to be thankful.

"Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful"
Colossians 3:5

"The greatest saint in the world is not he who prays most or fasts most; it is not he who gives alms, or is most eminent for temperance, chastity or justice. It is he who is most thankful to God."
William Law

Monday, March 28, 2011

Multitudes On Monday



This precious, wonderful list continues on this glorious Monday Morning.

211. Moon's light in the darkness.

212. Having a place saved for you.

213. Loves touch.

214. Loves first kiss.

215. Arms that hold you when you shake.

216. Strong legs that hold you up and take you where you need to go.

217. Green pastures.

218. Book stores.

219. Libraries.

220. Solved mysteries.

221. Solutions to problems.

222. Medicines that heal.

223. A surgeons steady hands.

224. Love stories.

225. Fearlessness.

226. Scented candles burning.

227. Melodies that teach us to dance.

228. Playing in puddles.

229. Dreams and visions.

230. Mud pies.

"Gratitude is the fairest blossom which springs from the soul."
Henry Ward Beecher

Sunday, March 27, 2011

Surrender Sunday


I am amazed by an AMAZING GOD today. He never ceases to amaze me...
So today, this beautiful Sunday morning I pay tribute to this amazing God, by just lifting up my hands and surrendering my entire being to Him today asking Him to teach me to do His will.

“Once we surrender our mind to GOD completely, HE will take care of us in every way.”
Sri Sathya Sai Baba


"If you have really handed yourself over to Him it must follow that you are trying to obey Him. But trying in a new way, a less worried way. Not doing these things in order to be saved, but because He has begun to save you already. Not hoping to get Heaven as a reward for your actions, but inevitably wanting to act in a certain way because a first faint gleam of Heaven is already inside you."
C.S. Lewis,


"Teach me to do your will,
for you are my God;
may your good Spirit
lead me on level ground."
Psalm 143:10

Saturday, March 26, 2011

The Dove's Song


Just outside my window this morning sat a dove... A cooing spotted dove. I was flabbergasted. I could hardly believe it when I saw him sitting there, pecking at my windowsill as if he wanted to come into my room. He sat there looking in at me whispering his song of coo's. I immediately forgot the painful yesterday and surrendered to the healing song of the dove who brings peace in the morning after a day and night of pain.

God...He is always singing our life song. Always bringing a new song to replace the sad songs in our lives.

God...He comes to us like a dove, as He arrives He carries peace and mercy with Him.
He extends the olive branch of promise that all will be well in our lives. Even the most painful moments will be OK.

So today, this new day there was joy in the morning just like He promises. There was joy after mourning, light after darkness and a new song to sing on this brand new day.

I am thankful today for the new song of the whispering, peaceful cooing dove.

"Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.

And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things [are] honest, whatsoever things [are] just, whatsoever things [are] pure, whatsoever things [are] lovely, whatsoever things [are] of good report; if [there be] any virtue, and if [there be] any praise, think on these things.

Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you."
Philippians 4:6-9

Friday, March 25, 2011

The Valley of Weeping

Today I can only get down on my knees and pray... pray hard and long and seek God's face. Seek God's face and ask... seek God's face and wonder... seek God's face and cry. I am being broken to pieces today. I am carrying a burden that is heavy. A load that bends me over underneath it's weight. I have been here before. It is a familiar place. I taste the salt in my tears, I have a hard ball in my throat that makes it hard to swallow... I heave for breath between sobs.... God is here. He is here with me. He carries me through... all the way through. I know His hand will wipe away each tear. His arms of compassion will embrace my broken heart. But, for now in this moment I will bend down, bow my head under the weight and pray... let it all out in prayer. I will sit here in His presence and allow myself to be embraced by a loving father who cares about all of the details of my life. I will bring to Him what has been broken and He will fix it. He will make all things new... He is here making all things new.Today I pass through the valley of weeping, but tomorrow there will be joy! Abundant joy.

Whenever you find tears in your eyes, especially unexpected tears,
it is well to pay the closest attention. They are not only telling the secret
of who you are, but more often than not of the mystery of where you have come from and are summoning you to where you should go next.”

Frederick Buechner
Whistling in the Dark


“Blessed—happy, fortunate [to be envied]—is the man whose strength is in You; in whose heart are the highways to Zion. Passing through the valley of weeping they make it a place of springs; the early rain also fills [the pools] with blessings. They go from strength to strength—increasing in victorious power; each of them appears before God in Zion”
Psalm 84:5-7 AMP

Thursday, March 24, 2011

St. Baldrick's


Today is going to be a long day for me. I have to work all day and then we are having a big event at the school where I work. We are hosting a St. Baldrick's event where 60 people will be shaving their heads to raise money for Pediatric Cancer. We have raised over $15,000.00 dollars so far. I am so honored to be a part of this event. But, we are expecting about 400 people to attend. It will be a lot of work. But, so worth it. Most important causes are a lot of work. It takes blood, sweat and tears to raise money for a cause. In this case it takes some hair too. You can find the link to this very important cause on this website:

www.stbaldricks.org

Check us out. Our organization's name is Latham Ridge Elementary School in Latham, N.Y.

God bless your day today.

"In everything I showed you that by working hard in this manner you must help the weak and remember the words of the Lord Jesus, that He Himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive."
Acts 20: 35

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Walk With Him Wednesdays



Oh the list continues... how it continues:

197. The sound of gentle rain.

198. Starry nights.

199. Rainbows.

200. Promises kept.

201. Fresh picked fruit.

202. Strong hearts.

203. Soulful moments.

204. Finding your way.

205. The smell and sound of the ocean.

206. Thirst quenched.

207. Hunger satisfied.

208. Rest for the weary.

209. Sun's warmth.

210. Finding cures.

"You say grace before meals. All right. But I say grace before the concert and the opera, and grace before the play and pantomime, and grace before I open a book, and grace before sketching, painting, swimming, fencing, boxing, walking, playing, dancing and grace before I dip the pen in the ink."
G.K. Chesterton


"We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures."
Thornton Wilder


"And whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him."
Colossians 3:17


Tuesday, March 22, 2011


Yesterday was the first official full day of Spring. We got 3 inches of new snow. Normally I would be seriously disappointed, but I wasn't. I just looked out and saw the snow covered ground. White. Stainless white. Glimmering like diamonds white. Underneath all of that glimmering fresh white, stainless snow... a glimmer of hope that Spring is definitely coming. Flowers. Spring Flowers. They are there! Spring is near. Today I am thankful that Spring is just around the corner, flowers blooming, fragrant and colorful... Spring!

"For behold, the winter is past,
The rain is over and gone.
'The flowers have already appeared in the land;
The time has arrived for pruning the vines,
And the voice of the turtledove has been heard in our land.
'The fig tree has ripened its figs,
And the vines in blossom have given forth their fragrance.
Arise, my darling, my beautiful one,
And come along!' "
Song 2:11-13

Monday, March 21, 2011

Monday's List



181. Hopes fulfilled

182. A clear path.

183. Feet that follow.

184. Feet that lead.

185. Selfless shoes to fill.

186. Truth being told.

187. Truth being heard.

188. Truth fulfilled.

189. New beginnings.

190. A new song.

191. Season's changing.

192. Meaning in life.

193. A perfectly composed poem.

194. Earthshaking revelations.

195. Breathtaking views.

196. Wishes that come true.


"And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him"
-Colossians 3:15-17

Sunday, March 20, 2011

God Bless All Moms

My son is getting ready to take his driving test soon and I have been the one taking him out to drive. I have to tell you it is a toe curling experience every time I step out with him to drive. He is a very good driver don't get me wrong, but there is just something about the protective mommy in me that my toes curl and my hands clench every time I go out to drive with my seventeen year old baby. I must say that my son is a very happy boy. He belly laughed at 8 weeks old. Really belly laughed. He has the most contagious laugh and a most beautiful smile. I love my son. He is far from perfect and I butt heads with him a lot... But, he is also one of my two greatest accomplishments. My other son Dominic is my other. So on this terrific Sunday, I say to all of you mom's out there: Being a mom is the hardest job in the world, but the reward of all that hard work is the greatest. God bless all the moms out there. Dad's too. Here are some quotes to think on today:

"I remember my mother's prayers and they have always followed me. They have clung to me all my life."
~Abraham Lincoln


"Some mothers are kissing mothers and some are scolding mothers, but it is love just the same, and most mothers kiss and scold together."
~Pearl S. Buck


"M-O-T-H-E-R
"M" is for the million things she gave me,
"O"means only that she's growing old,
"T" is for the tears she shed to save me,
"H" is for her heart of purest gold;
"E" is for her eyes, with love-light shining,
"R" means right, and right she'll always be,
Put them all together, they spell "MOTHER,"
A word that means the world to me."
--Howard Johnson (c. 1915)

"God could not be everywhere and therefore he made mothers."
-- A Jewish Proverb


"The mother's heart is the child's schoolroom."
-- Henry Ward Beecher (1813-1887)

"Youth fades; love droops, the leaves of friendship fall;
A mother's secret hope outlives them all."
-- Oliver Wendell Holmes (1809-1894)

"Mother's arms are made of tenderness,
and sweet sleep blesses the child who lies therein."
-- Victor Hugo

" A woman when she is in travail hath sorrow, because her hour is come: but as soon as she is delivered of the child, she remembereth no more the anguish, for joy that a man is born into the world."
John 16:21

"Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward."
Psalm 127:3

"My son, hear the instruction of thy father, and forsake not the law of thy mother: For they shall be an ornament of grace unto thy head, and chains about thy neck."
Proverbs 1:8-9


"She girds herself with strength, and strengthens herself daily. She perceives that her provision for her family is good: she does not retire early but works diligently to see to the needs of her family, she is not an idle woman."
Proverbs 31:17, 18, 27

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Because He Lives


Because He lives...

I can breathe and have being.
I can know my sins are forgiven.
I can know my debts are paid.
I can face another tomorrow.
I can forget the past.
I can run and not grow weary,
the race that is set before me.
I can fly on the wings
of the eagle.
I can walk on the water.
I can be washed whiter than snow.
I can have hope for the future.
Because He lives;
I CAN,
I WILL,
I CAN!

Friday, March 18, 2011

The Road Less Traveled


The Road Not Taken
By: Robert Frost

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.



Today I post this poem... one of my favorites. This poem makes me think...How taking the road less traveled makes such a difference in my life. How going where He leads has impacted every aspect of my life. How the path that may be thick with trees and narrow to walk on has been the very thing that sets my life apart from all the others who take the wide path that is easy. Being a Christian is not easy, but the reward is far greater then to not be a Christian. I am thankful today for the road less traveled.

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Peace and Thankfulness

At the end of a hard, long day I sit here just thanking God for the day. Even in the busy chaos of a day like today, His peace permeates my life. His order makes all things manageable. I am amazed by this. By His perfect peace. There are so many storms in life. So many obstacles to go through. He is there, directing the path, cheering us on when the going gets tough and equipping us to get through it all. I was tired today, run down and I felt empty. Then it happened... He came quickly and rescued me. He always comes, He always rescues and He always brings peace. For this I am thankful today.

I am amazed that no matter how I feel, He is there. Feelings are fleeting, but God is forever. He never weavers or changes. He is always there to bring rest to the weary and peace to the chaos.

"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid."
—John 14:27


"And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful."
—Colossians 3:15


"Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times in every way. The Lord be with you all."
—2 Thessalonians 3:16

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Walk With Him Wednesday



171. Fireworks to light the night time sky.

172. A shoulder to lean on.

173. A hand to hold.

174. Prayerful tears.

175. Life changing moments.

176. Lungs filled with clean fresh air.

177. Open hearts.

178. Vivid clear memories.

179. Transparent waters.

180. Someone to wipe away every tear.

"Life without thankfulness is devoid of love and passion. Hope without thankfulness is lacking in fine perception. Faith without thankfulness lacks strength and fortitude. Every virtue divorced from thankfulness is maimed and limps along the spiritual road." -John Henry Jowett
“Appreciation can make a day, even change a life. Your willingness to put it into words is all that is necessary.” -Margaret Cousins

"O give thanks to the Lord, call on His name; make known His doings among the peoples!"
1 Chronicles 16: 8

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Thankful Tuesday


Today I have a lot to be thankful for. I woke up this morning to a brand new day. I am alive and well and all whom I love and cherish are alive and well too. I have a job, that I love to go to. I have a car that is in great working order and takes me where I have to go. I have two beautiful dogs that love me unconditionally. It is well with my soul.

So today, this Tuesday I am thankful. Thankful that all is well with my soul. Then I remember there are people out there who are not okay today. There are those in Japan searching for thousands of loves ones still missing. In one village alone there are ten thousand people missing. So today I am thankful but also praying for those who are not able to say thanks today. For those who are going through something unthinkable today, my prayers and thoughts are with them.

I am thankful though that families are being reunited, a 4 month old baby girl was found alive and reunited with her parents. There is something beautiful in the ashes when you hear this kind of story in the midst of the tragedy.

So today I say thank you God.... for all of the many gifts in my life. All the miracles that happen after disasters strike and the beauty in the ugly, that proves without doubt your amazing grace is there day after day for all the world to see.

Monday, March 14, 2011

Multitudes On Monday








161. Date night.

162. Everything in it's proper place.

163. Alters to kneel in front of.

164. A lit candle.

165. Warm cloths fresh from the dryer.

166. Quieting the chaos.

167. Promises kept.

168. New puppies.

169. Eskimo kisses.

170. A twinkle in his eye.

Sunday, March 13, 2011

A Day of Rest

Sunday is a day of rest... so I am taking a rest today.


Enjoy your day of rest.

"Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. "Take My yoke upon you, and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart; and you shall find rest for your souls. "For My yoke is easy, and My load is light."
Matthew 11:28-30

Saturday, March 12, 2011



I can only go on bended knee and pray for the people effected by the earthquake and tsunami in Japan. Pray that the God who sees all, sees them right now, in this very moment and He comes quickly to rescue, comfort and heal their land. That His hand mends the brokenness, picks up all the scattered and shattered pieces and sweeps up all of the ashes. He sees. He knows. He is with them. I kneel here today praying that they know He cares, He comforts, He loves and He heals. This is my bended knee prayer today.





Friday, March 11, 2011

Happy Friday

A most Happy Friday to all today.

I can only continue with my list today. I make a joyful sound with my list.

151. Lost phone found.

152. Birthday's

153. Dog's howling a song of praise.

154. Answered prayers.

155. Happy hearts.

156. A day off.

157. Christmas lights.

158. A clean house.

159. Having a reason.

160. A clean rest stop bathroom... priceless.

Enjoy your Friday everyone!

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Thursday's Simmer

So today, I sit here and just simmer. I am in a new place, a foreign place. A land that I have never tread upon before. A new wineskin, filled with new wine. I am becoming a new person. A person who instead of reacting in fear, is beginning to react in prayer and thanksgiving. When crisis hits, and clamour comes, I bend the knee to pray and thank the Lord for whatever cup I am given. What a change. What a new perspective. New eyes to see, new ears to hear and a new heart that beats to a new rhythm to march to life. Being thankful has made me more trusting. Seeing and naming all of the gifts in my life has caused me to see that His hand, His eyes and His thoughts are always on me. He sees me where ever I am. He hears my voice call for help. He thinks good thoughts towards me. He is becoming my father. My Abba Father that takes care of me. Protecting me and keeping me safe. Listening to me and having the answer I need to any question I may have. Embracing me with love and adoration every day. Every second of the day. EVERY SINGLE ONE!

So... today I simmer in this new found revelation. I have always known these things about God. That He cares about every detail of my life. That He is my Abba Father. That He loves me unconditionally. But... now I know FIRST HAND. I know without doubt or weaver that the Almighty loves me and is my Father. My daddy, that I can run to ater skinning my knee, and He cares. He cares about me. He bends down and kisses the broken, bleeding places and makes all things new.

Revelation 21:5 NKJV
Then He who sat on the throne said,
“Behold, I make all things new.”
And He said to me, “Write, for these
words are true and faithful.”


"Thou hast given so much to me,
Give one thing more, - a grateful heart;
Not thankful when it pleaseth me,
As if Thy blessings had spare days,
But such a heart whose pulse may be Thy praise."
~George Herbert


"Gratitude is the fairest blossom which springs from the soul."
~Henry Ward Beecher

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Walk With Him Wednesday



137. The perfect blend of herbal tea.

138. A creamy slice of cheesecake.

139. Movie night with the family.

140. New baby ducks swimming in a row.

141. New fresh paint on the walls.

142. A violin playing a soft beautiful song.

143. cleansing tears.

144. Hot fudge on a Sunday.

145. Iced Tea.

146. My dogs sigh.... just before he falls asleep.

147. My son's eyes that light up the room.

148. Waiting for the ice cream man.

149.The perfect pen to write with.

150. The glow of a bride on her wedding day.


I am learning how to be thankful, even when things are grim, there is something to be thankful for. Here are some quotes to think of throughout your day today:

“Offer unto God thanksgiving; and pay thy vows unto the most High” Psalm 50:14

“God gave you a gift of 86,400 seconds today. Have you used one to say ‘thank you?’” —William A. Ward

“He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has.” —Epictetus

“Gratitude can transform common days into thanksgivings, turn routine jobs into joy, and change ordinary opportunities into blessings.” — William Arthur Ward

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Rejoice

Today I can only post this scripture. Philippians 4:4-9. I need this today. I feel opposite of this and do not even know why. So I remind myself of this today in the hopes that I will listen.




"4:4 Rejoice in the Lord always [delight, gladden yourselves in Him]; again I say, Rejoice!

4:5 Let all men know {and} perceive {and} recognize your unselfishness (your considerateness, your forbearing spirit). The Lord is near [He is coming soon].

4:6 Do not fret {or} have any anxiety about anything, but in every circumstance {and} in everything, by prayer and petition (definite requests), with thanksgiving, continue to make your wants known to God.

4:7 And God's peace [shall be yours, that tranquil state of a soul assured of its salvation through Christ, and so fearing nothing from God and being content with its earthly lot of whatever sort that is, that peace] which transcends all understanding shall garrison {and} mount guard over your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

4:8 For the rest, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is worthy of reverence {and} is honorable {and} seemly, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely {and} lovable, whatever is kind {and} winsome {and} gracious, if there is any virtue {and} excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think on {and} weigh {and} take account of these things [fix your minds on them].

4:9 Practice what you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, {and} model your way of living on it, and the God of peace (of untroubled, undisturbed well-being) will be with you."

Monday, March 7, 2011



Last night we were awoken at one o'clock in the morning to a power outage due to a ice storm. Our generator was broken and did not work so from one a.m., until four a.m., my entire family bailed out water from our sump pump so that our basement would not flood. We worked together as a team, and actually laughed joyfully at each other and with each other through the entire three hours. It was a far cry from the screaming and yelling that took place just three years prior when we were doing the same bailing out of water that we did last night. God's joy and thanksgiving in our hearts is what is making all the difference in our lives as individuals and our lives as a family unit. Being thankful has brought unity and harmony in my family and for this I am so thankful for today. I continue my list of blessings:

116. Unity and harmony.

117. Long eyelashes that touch the top of my husbands cheekbones as he sleeps.

118. Fresh, clean water to drink.

119. Children laughing out loud.

120. A soft kiss on the cheek.

121. A hand on the shoulder.

122. Dolphin's swimming in the ocean.

123. The perfect red dress.

124. Flip flops for Summer.

125. Green clovers in the field.

126. Silver glitter on black paper.

127. The birthday boy.

128. Sun showers.

129. Watching an ant carry a leaf across the patio.

130. The sound of your husbands car pulling into the driveway at the end of a work day.

131. A home cooked meal.

132. Mom's meatballs.

133. A new picture to hang on the fridge.

134. A's on a report card.

135. Chocolate melting in your mouth.

136. A juicy piece of water melon.

Sunday, March 6, 2011

Sunday's List

I can only be thankful on Sunday's... so I will continue my list:

96. A baby asleep in their crib.

97. The words: "you are cancer free."

98. The words: "I love you."

99. A gold ring worn on your ring finger, and all that ring implies.

100. Knowing he is mine and I am his.

101. Belonging to someone.

102. Knowing someone belongs to you.

103. A dogs playful prance.

104. Holy moments.

105. Your time alone with God.

106. Eternity!

107. Knowing for certain God exists.

108. Believing.

109. A cross.

110. A phone's ring.

111. Kodak moments.

112. A picture worth a thousand words.

113. Words that create a picture.

114. The glimmering light in one's eyes when their soul awakens.

115. The way my dogs eyebrows move when he is thinking about what I say to him.


“… give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.”
1 Thess. 5:18

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Lessons From A Child

It was my son's 17th birthday yesterday. We celebrated by going to Dinosaur BBQ for dinner. While we gathered together to celebrate and feast, I looked across the table at my big beautiful son... where has the time gone? It was only yesterday he was the little four year old boy sitting in a car seat in the backseat of my car, teaching me one of the greatest lessons in my life when he asked me this question:
"Mom, when will the leaves come back on the trees so that they can make music again?"
Dumbfounded by this question I replied by asking this question:
"What do you mean baby?"
This is what my four year old musician son said:
"Mom, the trees are all bald headed now, they have no leaves. When the trees have leaves and the wind blows on them, they make music with their leaves... can't you hear their song?"

Of course, this response from my then four year old son, made me laugh cry. Mostly cry. I was so touched by his observation of the music and song that the leaves of a tree make. Oh how I wish my ears were opened to hear what he heard. This made me think.. like trees we go through seasons in our lives that may strip away our colorful music making leaves. We sit there bare, exposed and naked like a tree without it's leaves. Our branches are flailing in the cold wind of Winter... there is no sound, just movement. A dance of branches that dig down deep to the roots remembering the song of the season that brings leaves back to our branches.

So, my reply to my son was this:
"Son, the trees are dancing as they remember their leaf song. They hear it from deep down. If you just look you will see their branches moving to the beat of that familiar leaf song you hear."

He said:
"Mommy you are right! I see it!"
He began to hum softly the song he saw. The song he hears.

I looked through the rear view mirror at the little boy who hummed and dance along to a tree song.

...Today I sit across from this little boy who has become a man. A man who hums this same song today. Sparkling brown/green eyes and a smile that brightens up the room. My music man.

He taught me then and still teaches me every day since, to flail my branches and dance to the song that comes when His Spirit blows in my life. The colorful leaves may come and go but, the song in your heart,the song embedded way down deep into the roots of your being, this song will never fade away.

Friday, March 4, 2011

He Is There

I have decided to live my life searching... for Him. His face, His touch, His words and His eyes. I have decided to walk in His footsteps. Live life in His breath. Listen for His voice and make the beat of His heart my rhythm in motion.

He is in the low places, the deep and dark crevices of of life... the unlovely, the unkempt moments in time. He is there. Eyes wide open there. Healing and mending hands, there.

He is in the high places. The peaks. The perfect, priceless moments. The moments that take your breath away. The Heaven touches earth moments. He is there. Eyes sparkling. Hands clapping and lifting, there.

He is there in the dark morning moments. There when those slumbered, sleep encrusted eyes begin to open and focus. He is there at first light, as we watch the sun rise and erase the darkness of night. Illuminating light shining, there.

He is there when the sun goes down, casting shadows upon the earth. As grass sleeps in the fields and trees become the resting place for the worm catching birds. He is there. Singing a lullaby of love, there.

I have seen my share of grievances. Death and decay. Darkness and gloom. Heart ache and pain. He is ever there. Wiping tears. Mending broken bones. Collecting splintered and fractured pieces. He is there. Always there.

I have lived joyfully and had much laughter in life. Dancing and celebration. Songs of praise. He is there dancing and teaching flying lessons. He is there.

He is a warm coat on a cold Winters night. He is a cold lake to swim in on Hot Summer day. He is there in every moment. He is there. He sees me right here, right now. He sees. He knows. He is there.

Now, my eyes are open. Fully open. I finally see that He sees me. I can see His eyes that are wide open to me. The scales have fallen off my eyes and I can see the face of God. He is here. He is here. Looking at me.

I now know that no matter what life throws at me. He is there. I can accept what I was given yesterday. I can accept what I will be given tomorrow. I can accept my lot in life, every day of my life. Past, present and future. He is there.

"...to accept your lot in life- that indeed is a gift from God. People who do this rarely look with sorrow on the past, for God has given them reasons for JOY."
Ecclesiastes 5:19-20

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Under Construction


God is working on me.... I am learning to "Be still" and know. To see... to fully see Him in all things in my life. Even the ugly things.
I am allowing the demolition to take place. The construction to undergo. I am allowing God to tear down with His bare beautiful hands the old house, and rebuild with His Beautiful hands the new construction of my heart. I am amazed at what He creates.... I will keep you posted....


"...A time to tear down and a time to build up."

Monday, February 28, 2011

Monday's List



81. Sowing seeds.
82. Falls harvest abundant and colorful.
83. A growing garden.
84. Watering of parched land.
85. Words to live by.
86. First in line.
87. A new favorite pair of shoes.
88. Cures for disease.
89. Homes for the homeless.
90. Colorful, warm quilts.
91. A caterpillars surrender to turn into a butterfly.
92. A butterflies dance under the blue sky.
93. The song of the morning bird perched high in the oak tree.
94 Fingers running through hair.
95. A box of new crayons.


Thankful for the many blessings today in my life. Most thankful that my eyes are open to see those many blessings. My ears are open to hear, and my feet are dancing not just walking to the new song of joy and thanksgiving inside my heart.

"...the blind see, the lame walk, the lepers are cured, the deaf hear, the dead are raised to life, and the Good News is being preached to the poor."
Matthew 11:5

Sunday, February 27, 2011

A New Dance


Today is the the last day of my Mid Winter Break Vacation from work. I head back to work tomorrow. I have to say, normally I would be sad that the break was over and that I was going back to work tomorrow. But today, I am a new creature. Old things have passed away. I AM NEW! I am learning that I MUST be thankful in ALL things.Even the things that I once thought were hard, He is there. If I look closely, I can see His face, His beautiful eyes looking at me. God is everywhere I look. He is in the new snow that fell over the past two days. He is in the snow capped branches on the trees... the same branches that if you look closely, I see the buds of Spring just under those freshly formed caps of snow. He is in the everyday routine of getting up while it is still dark (and the rest of my family is still fast asleep), to prepare lunches for school and work, prep the dogs for separation from their people and before the working the fingers to the bone at my job. He is there. His eyes wink in delight at me. He is there!
He is there with me every step I take, every breath I breathe and with every beat of my heart. He is there, He is beautifully, miraculously risen... He is there. His rhythm has been orchestrated. His melody is playing softly within my heart. It moves me, guides me in a new dance of life's blessings giving me a new heart that is now filled with a brand new song of gratitude and joys abundant overture. I literally feel my feet gliding off the floor as I dance this new dance to this new magnificent song. This dance is carefree, elegant, graceful and perfectly choreographed by the Master Choreographer. He leads as I follow. This dance fills my life, my heart, my very being with new meaning, new hope and a new awakening to my once asleep feet and my once slumbered heart. I am ALIVE! I am AWAKE! I am dancing with my King, here and now, today, in this very moment. We are face to face dancing, cheek to cheek.
In the words of a great author, that is changing my entire outlook on life, I end with this quote from her book:

"So then as long as thanks is possible... I think this through. As long as thanks is possible, then joy is possible. Joy is always possible. Whenever, meaning- now. Whenever, meaning- here. The holy grail of joy is not in some exotic location or some emotional mountain peak experience. The joy wonder could be here! Here in the messy, pierced ache now, joy might be- unbelievably- possible! The only place we need to see before we die is this place of seeing God, here and now."
Ann Voskamp - One Thousand Gifts


Live joyfully today in the here, in the now. Look for His face. If you look closely you will find that He is there looking back, seeing you right where you are and ready to dance with you.

"Let them joyfully praise his name with dancing, making melody to him with tambourine and lyre!" Psalm 149:3

Saturday, February 26, 2011

Saturday's Joy


So continues my list of joys in my life:

66. My husbands voice.

67. The first words out of my boys mouth: "mama".

68. Full proof recipes.

69. Full tank of gas.

70. Fresh baked bread.

71. Hot soup on a cold winter's night.

72. The perfect song at the perfect time.

73. Life changing moments.

74. Experience.

75. The calm after the storm.

76. Clean fresh air.

77. Beginning each day as if it were on purpose.

78. Reading books.

79. Daring to imagine you can have a different life.

80. Prayerful moments.


I end with this quote that I read on a sign I saw for sale at a Hobby Lobby store.
I am not sure who wrote it, the sign did not say. But, this sign inspired me and brought joy to my heart when I read it and I would like to share the words on this sign with you today.

"Care more than others think wise.
Risk more than others think safe.
Dream more than others think practical.
Expect more than others think possible."


This quote is my prayer for you today.

Friday, February 25, 2011

Life Gives and Takes Away


I spent the day at the mall yesterday with my boys. My 16 year old son Christian, had a driving lesson and the place that he took the lesson is located inside the mall. While Christian was out learning how to parallel park and do three point turns, I spent my time reading at the Barnes and Noble in the mall. The second I walked in the store my heart began to skip a beat and I started skipping too. Literally! My 13 year old son Dominic, was very embarrassed and walked away to the magazine section of the store with his cousins. I worked my way around the store alone and did all my usual rounds, journals, cookbooks, Christian books, stationary.... I did not purchase anything, but boy was it fun browsing. After 45 minutes had passed my son text me that his lesson was over, we met up and soon enough were out the door heading home.

Life just flies right by. In the blink of an eye my little baby boy has become a young man learning how to drive. By April he will have his license and be driving. I have his appointment all scheduled with DMV for his road test. If he passes my son will be driving a car on his own in April. It was only yesterday he was driving a fake steering wheel from the backseat of my car as he sat in his car seat. How could time have flown by so fast? Where did all of that time go? If only I could bottle him up as a little baby and keep him that way, safe and hidden inside the pocket of my heart. But, the truth is life just flashes by and our kids grow up and become independent. I wish I could capture them as they are in this picture that you see here. They were tiny little men that needed mom for everything. Now they are big growing young men that try not to need me at all. They walk away from me in stores because they are embarrassed of me. Or they go somewhere else entirely to learn something like driving, while I sit alone and wait for them to return to me.

Life... we get our chance with life and then life takes it's chances on us. All we have to do is decide what chances we will take, and what chances we will allow life to take on us, with the time we have been given. Chances to love and capture love. Chances to come undone and be vulnerable. Chances to pull back and reserve. Chances to let go or hold on. Then life fires back, it comes round and fires back. It gives, then takes away. It holds us and then let's us go.

People have told me my whole life that "change is good." But, what this really means is that something I did not want to happen has happened to me. I do not want my kids to grow up, become independent of me, and move away to live their own separate lives from me. I want them still clinging to my leg, holding on to me, never letting me go. But, life is moving. Faster then I want it to sometimes, and I have to let go and enjoy the ride. Find some joy in the letting go process, in the taking away process. For everything in life that is taken away, something is added back to us. So today, on this snowy February day in the Northeast, I hold onto the memories of my little men, and I release them into the life that I now press onward into. Knowing that through this release something more beautiful and lovely awaits me as my little men become big men.

"For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven."
Ecclesiastes 3:1

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Books


I love books. Whenever I go into a book store I feel like a kid in a candy shop. I usually head straight to the journals first. I am always in need of a new journal to write my thoughts into. Usually after I find the perfect journal, I head to the cook book isle. I collect cook books and recipes. There is nothing like a good recipe to make my mouth water. I love to cook, it calms me after a long hard day at work. There is something therapeutic about cooking. I feel like all is well with the world and in my life when I put together the ingredients of a full proof recipe like Chicken Marsala, or Pasta Figioli. Both recipes I grew up on and have been in my family for generations. I have always had a dream to write a cook book of my own some day. I just never get the time....

After I am finished in the cook book section of a book store, I always head to the Christian books next. I try to look for an author I have never read before. I found a book once written by a monk named Thomas Merton entitled "The Seven Story Mountain". This book changed my life in a profound way. It urged me to seek out peace and serenity for my life, which at the time was chaotic and filled with whirlwinds. Before I found this book in the book store on the clearance rack for a mere five dollars, I had never heard of Thomas Merton before. But, boy I am so glad that I discovered this monk and his book. This book was like a warm fuzzy blanket on a cold winters day in my life. I also found books by several other authors that I knew and loved throughout the years. Books... they effect us. When you read a book it somehow becomes part of your identity. You are what you read.

When I was a child I hated to read. Probably because I was dyslexic. I stayed back in third grade because I did not know how to read well yet. If you put me in a book store as a kid, I probably would have cried a tantrum kind of cry and panicked as if I were about to be killed. But, today a book store is like a green pasture. A place where God restore my soul. Books themselves are like still waters. The place where peace and serenity meet and kiss.

"He makes me lie down in green pastures,
He leads me beside quiet waters,
He restores my soul."
Psalm 23:2


Most people relate this scripture to funerals. But, the truth is, this piece of scripture is about peace and serenity. Having God lead us to a green pasture is really having God lead us to the most beautifully green meadow or garden. A place that calms our souls and brings us peaceful happiness. The still, quiet waters is a place of true serenity. A place where the deer that is panting for waters comes to drink. A place where God meets us and fills our dry and parched souls to overflowing with His living waters. All is well here. All is calm.

Books. I can't live without them. They are my green pasture, my quiet waters, my peace. Books are a tool that God uses in my life on a daily basis to help me dare to imagine that I can have a different life. Books help me remember where I came from, and help me see more clear to discover where I can only dream of going. People can't really know where they are going until they know where they have been. Books help me to find these answers. Books help me to remember who I am, who He is and who He says I am going to be. What are books to you?